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Children and Black Friday. Should you take them with you?


jaymacfla

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I know that sometimes pregnant women go out and brave the elements and help us men when possible, but why would anyone take a child out into the cold for many hours on Black Friday? At what age would you deem it admissible and would the choice of either indoor or outdoor environments influence your decision?
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I'm not fond of seeing that, and I do every year. Most of them are probably selfish and mental... but in that mix of people who bring their small children, there may be a handfull of them who sincerely have nobody to watch their child that evening/morning (for any of a variety of reasons) but still want to make their dollar stretch a little farther during a time of year where money becomes really thin for those who already have tight budgets. Just an idea.
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this is a never ending question that gets asked every year. It is not up to any one to decide if some one else who parents their children should or shouldn't take there children. I know a whole property or two of mom's who if they didn't take their children with them, then those children would get nothing.
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My youngest goes, and will continue to go until she reaches the age where she'll remember what's in the cart. Which might be this year. lol I don't stand in lines in the cold for an absurd number of hours, so its no big deal. I go into walmart about 7:30AM and I usually only hit Walmart and Kmart. Its just like any other shopping trip.
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I think alot of it depends if you are going to be in extreme cold and how long you are going to be out and if it will put your child in danger. My friend always takes her youngest (she is 3 now). she had no one to keep her in the past but may have someone this year. Her husband always worked that day and now they are divorced. Her dad may keep her daughter if he doesn't have to go shopping w/her mom.

 

We go to Walmart first and we are there early. Our Walmart is nothing like those you see on TV and on this website..lol. We live in a small town and we know almost everyone that we see out that morning. So it is not dangerous at all.

 

I would go if I had to take my kids bc that is the only way that they get a Christmas some years. I have taken one of mine one time and it was in a different city. I said then that I would not ever go to that city again especially with a kid. We got there around 6:15 so it was right after the big rush. But it was so crowded that I was constantly worried about him getting away from me.

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Wow, I appreciate the perspectives here! Some are of the opinion that there is truly only one shot to get the gifts at the price they need to pay for an item. So far, most agree that it is ok to take a child, as long as it is past the rush and not in a line outside for a great deal of time. Those are my concerns. I see it happen every year. I was once in a Walmart and two smaller children were next to me for the Razor scooters. Remember those? The crowd was pressing so hard, the kids were getting crushed. I yelled back to the crowd to ease up and I would hand the scooters back to them. After that, it was ok, but i sure was scared for those kids!
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Yeah I'd never be interested in taking my kids out on black friday. In fact my whole family tradition revolves around leaving them with grandma so my whole day would be blown if I were worrying about my kids safety on black friday. How would I buy thier gifts with them present anyway?
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I think its sad that sometimes "other people" are more worried about peoples kids than they are themselves. I know kids can be impossible sometimes but if you're not watching them you don't know who else might be. Aside from the big crowds, there's all sorts of sickos out there. Many times I'll be standing in line watching some toddler wander around only to have parent in front/behind me get into a panic over not seeing kid and I'll point the kid out. No doubt the kid will be yelled at etc. Sure the kid shouldn't have left their side but maybe mentioning that sooner and actually ensuring it happens might make it stick a little more in jr's mind instead of giving them a good rollicking 10 minutes or more after the fact.
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First let me say that as a motherof soon to be 6 children, I love my children dearly and would never put them in harms way, I would sacrifice my own life for theirs. Second, When we started BF shopping was 8 years ago, We had 2 kids & NO ONE to watch our kids, we don't have alot of friends and certianly none that would take our kids and watch them, some older some worked, even my dad wouldn't take them. My husbands parents are both gone. We lived on a very limited budget to say the least. We bought our home when my husband was only making 9$ an hour and I don't work (Stay at home mom & homeschool our kids). BF was a way for us to get our kids alot of just nessesities (clothes & such) at a great price. It was cold, we live in NY. I bundled them tightly put them in the stoller (then 4 & 2 years old & we stood in line outdoors for about an hour. They were not cold, hungry or tired, as a matter of fact they were very excited, it was like an adventure. That was the only year we had to stand outside & sears even gave them each a 10$ gift card because they waited there too. It went toward there gifts for Christmas. We as parents were in no way being selfish. The next year we had a baby our 3rd child & some friends said they would take the older kids overnight. So we let me go, 1am my friend is banging on the door becuase my son was throwing up. He was homesick & had eaten way too much the day before (Thanksgiving day). We went and got them both & yes we went BF shopping still. My son wasn't even sick, no fever, just really homesick poor guy. We stood in line in the mall that year with all 3 of our children, nice & warm, lots of snacks and no crankyness. We did BF shopping with all our kids until 3 or 4 years ago, we found some really awesome friends, they offered to take the kids Thanksgiving night have a sleep over and care for them all the next day! Besides that my kids LOVE them, no homesickness or fear of leaving home, even our 2 yearold wants to spend the night and has fallen asleep there when we are gone past bedtime. In 2008 M was only 2 months old, I put her in my Moby Wrap, covered with a blanket & we stood in the mall for 1/2 hour, all warm, no issues. Where we shop its not a battle ground, We don't go to Walmart, sorry but too many people think Walmart is the dream BF place or that is the only place they can go to get good deals and most people are not considerate there at all, to me that is dangerous & I wouldn't bring my kids there. Here in our town, the closest store is Walmart, I live in a mostly generational welfare town, yes I do trust me, everyone in this town can't afford to get to the city to shop so they bombard our local walmart, they are unconsiderate 100% of the time, they are so poor that they will do anything to get what they need to get on BF and that is sad, so I travel over an hour to go shop somewhere calm. Third, If you put your child in danger or make them unhappy/cranky & they are screaming & crying disturbing others, I don't think you should bring them. My kids were niver cross about going and in fact loved it very much, but they love staying with our friends now too. I know not everyone has someone to watch there kids, trust me been there. These are the only people who I know are great with my kids and truly love them and for that I'm very happy. I'm glad they came along on top of being great friends to us theylove having our kids, that makes life so much easier on us. Now that I'm rambling.... Thats my story :)
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Having 3 kids, I wouldn't take mine with me, even my oldest who is almost 8. For one, I wouldn't want her to see what I am buying and the other being that I know I wouldnt be able to keep an eye on her the whole time while I am looking for what I need. I would be afraid someone would take her.

 

I try not to pass judgement on those who I see with young kids out cuz you never do really know if they just didnt have someone to watch them. They could be like me, here all alone with no family to watch them and friends who think you are crazy to go out so early. I am thankful that my dh gets that day off from work and can watch the kids.

 

The saddest thing I seen last year was a girl who must have been 7 or 8 and was checking out with her mom. The girl started throwing up and her mom was holding open the little girls coat to puke in. I felt so bad for her. I was about 6 people away from them and the 5 others in front of me were so grossed out by it, they left the line and I ended up being next to check out. I did ask the mom if she needed help and she said no but did ask why I am still standing there, the others had left. I told her I had 3 kids, nothing grosses me out anymore, lol. She laughed.

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DD wants to go but she is only 7 and I don't feel she is ready yet. I told when she is 10 we will talk about it, she thinks that means she will go at ten (probably will) but I will still back out if I feel the need. I still think its the parent's choice and would not think badly of someone who brings their child. I don't know their individual situation.
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I have never taken my DD out, but may this year, if she wants to go for the adventure of it. She is now 11 and may enjoy it. BF, regardless of where we lived, has never been pleasant weather-wise, so I have always left her with family or friends. Also, there is too much shoving, so I would never take her. I don't think material things are worth the risk that some people take to shop on BF by taking their small children. There are great sales year round and much shopping can be done online. Just my opinion.
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I was talking about this with my friend yesterday, we usually leave the kids on black friday but this year our husband's are deployed :-( so nobody to watch the kids. She wants to go to target at 3AM she took her kids last year they were sleeping. But I just can't do it! I feel bad for my girls. So I guess I am going to try Target around 8AM I usually don't buy doorbusters or toys so I guess I would be good.

 

I agree with others here is a person to person situation.

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When our kids were much younger I did take them. Simply I didn't have family or friends able to watch them and to hire a sitter from the newspaper for one day is scary.. but also for 5 kids would have been extremely expensive. So I took the kids, sometimes in PJ's, sometimes not. Either way, I never let them get in harm's way although I do remember one year when the youngest was a little over a year old and he was in his PJ's and snowsuit with blankets on him and it was snowing... he was warm.. my arms felt like they weighed 50 pounds each from holding him against me so long as I think he gained weight as time went on...

 

Fortuneately, a few years ago I had a niece get old enough to babysit and finances allowed me to pay her or to bring her back a special surprise and now it is my day alone with my sister. We look forward to our "date" alone together every year. And I am thankful my kids are now old enough to stay home alone and I can just wake up and leave. They know on Thanksgiving Mom is going to bed early and they better not be loud or Santa won't come visit them.

 

Would I take them out now? If I felt I needed to, yes. I have no problem with kids as long as they are being taken care of, kept warm, etc. I have been there... when I had to... I simply don't want to take them as that is my time away from them and they are too old to believe my old stories of "this truck is for us to give your cousin for Christmas, and if you like it that much I will be sure to ask Santa to get you one just like it"... it worked for a while... but at ages 11, 13, 14, 16, and 22 I think they have caught on. ;)

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When my children were younger I would hit one or two stores and be back in time for my husband to go to work. It was the only way I could do it and while it wasn't perfect (only had a couple of hours), it worked. I got most of what I wanted. Last year I did take DD12 because our Walmart was open all night. She was excited at first but about 3 she was soooooo tired lol.
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I look forward to when I can take my dd. She is only 4 now and I would take her if I had to, but my husband usually doesn't work that day and even if he does my mom will keep her. She is giving me money to get all of the grandkids' Christmas presents so she knows I can't take her. My boys are 12 and they will stay with my parents or my husband's parents. It just depends if my dad has to work or not. She is not able to go shop that day anyway because she has rheumathoid arthritis.

 

I will probably take her when she quits believing in Santa and I know that she will enjoy it. It will definitely become a tradition though (if she likes it). My boys mentioned that they may like to go to Walmart with me this year. We live in small town and there is no danger. They are as big as many adults anyway..lol. But I figure they will back out when I try to get them up at midnight..lol.

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I was talking about this with my friend yesterday, we usually leave the kids on black friday but this year our husband's are deployed :-( so nobody to watch the kids. She wants to go to target at 3AM she took her kids last year they were sleeping. But I just can't do it! I feel bad for my girls. So I guess I am going to try Target around 8AM I usually don't buy doorbusters or toys so I guess I would be good.

 

I agree with others here is a person to person situation.

Target has a little secret: Target will roll out product throughout the day. I went there a couple of years ago at 5 PM and got everything I wanted. I am sure that each store is different, but the bottom line is that they want to keep a steady flow of customers throughout the day.
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When my children were younger I would hit one or two stores and be back in time for my husband to go to work. It was the only way I could do it and while it wasn't perfect (only had a couple of hours), it worked. I got most of what I wanted. Last year I did take DD12 because our Walmart was open all night. She was excited at first but about 3 she was soooooo tired lol.

 

 

 

 

 

 

That is a good age to start!

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I took my kids last year for the first time. One was 16 the other 8. Never again. My 16 yr old passed out in Walmart while I was checking out and had to leave the store via ambulance! Luckily I had gotten all my doorbusters. She didn't eat breakfast before we went and her blood sugar bottomed out. Was scary at first but then once I realized she was ok, I told her never again. Didn't get to shop anymore that day.
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I took my kids last year for the first time. One was 16 the other 8. Never again.

 

My oldest son (14 at the time) and I went for the first time 2 years ago. Had a blast. My mom and I took him again last year because she was here. My two little ones were left with their daddy for the morning since Friday is his regular day off. This year, I will have to work at noon, so my son (now 16) and I will probably go and be back by 11. We have a blast though. It can be fun going with the older kids (make sure they eat something first.) Sorry your first time wasn't as fun as ours was.

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I have been shopping BF for about 13 years now. I have never taken my oldest, who is 12. This year if I want to do BF, all 3 kids have to go with me. That includes my twins which will be almost 9 months at the time. With that said, I have already been in the talks with a friend to see if she would be able to spend the night at my house and listen for them if they get up while I go out early morning. I would be back by 9 at the latest. That afternoon I was planning on taking all the kids with me to the mall I go to. My DH is deploying for 6 months right before Christmas this year and if we want to have a Christmas, the kids have to come with me. We live in So Cal so weather really isn't an issue. Yes it is a bit chilly, but we are talking maybe 50's if not 60's. I know to some that is hot on BF! LOL But I wouldn't take them 1st thing in the morning, to me that is crazy. And if it turns out that I am not happy with the ads, I just might sit out this year. :shock:
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My oldest was 9 when she started going with me. I live in a very small town so it's relatively safe. I warned her multiple times what it would be like and she was pretty terrified at first, she just sat back and watched. Now she gets in there and grabs doorbusters with the best of them. She's 12 and it's become our tradition.

 

My youngest is almost 8 and I would never take her, it would be a very bad idea.

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I really think it's up to the parents and you shouldn't judge. That being said - be good parents! Keep your kids safe, warm and happy. Those $4 P.J.'s are not worth your kid being hurt, getting sick or dragging your infant out of your house to stand in the cold for three hours! If I am not going to judge you for taking your kids out to the mall on one of the busiest days of the year, then I expect you to also be polite when I tell JR to go back to his mother when he is running around screaming and pulling stuff off the shelves due to lack of supervision (because you are shopping).
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Personally, I wouldn't take young kids out. It's to easy to get separated from someone in the crowd. I've had people running into the back of my legs with carts and I wouldn't want someone plowing into my kids with their cart. Some stores I don't even use a cart so the kids would have to walk. Last year I stayed home and shopped online because I had a 2 year old and a newborn at home. The newborn was breast feeding so I couldn't leave her and there was no way I'd take her out.
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