georgiapeach717 Posted October 27, 2009 Posted October 27, 2009 POD Please don't judge people! I still cry over the year 20+ years ago that I couldn't buy NOT ONE THING for my kids even on BLk Friday! if not for my neighbors my kids would have had NOTHING my neighbors got them 2 small toys each. They don't remember it BUT I do and like I said I still cry when I remember that year! so when you see kids out there PLEASE remember this may be the only way they are getting ANYTHING for christmas!hence my original post. while i could be understanding of it, it is all very situational to me...
inluvstill Posted October 27, 2009 Posted October 27, 2009 I use to think the same way, however a few years back there was a young woman in line infront of me with a 1 year old a few people made snarky comments about it and she could hear them ( i was nto one of them) eventually she and I got to talking and I found out she and her brother were the only living members of thier family and her Husband didnt have any family either (he was raised in foster care) And not even 6 months before her Husband had been killed (army) and then her brother had been injured and lost his leg (Marines) so she really had no one and didnt know anyone really. I felt really bad for her, I asked her what she was looking for and it was mainly just the deals ont he clothes for her little girl that she really needed. I asked her for her name and number and she gave it to me, needless to say I added a nother 2 people to my list that year and we are great friends now and her daughter stays with my kids at my home on black friday.Wow, what a great story! Puts things into perspective!
Elmck Posted October 27, 2009 Posted October 27, 2009 My DD age 6 was listening to me talk about going shopping on BF and got very excited. She is my shopping buddy, and is usually with me. I told her she could not go on that day and she cried, I felt like a jerk. I had to explain that if she was with me there would be no Christmas surprises. We also agreed that she can go when she turns 10, if she is still interested.
berry1014 Posted October 27, 2009 Posted October 27, 2009 I took my daughter shopping on BF once 8 years ago when she was an infant but it was also later in the morning when DH had to leave for work. He worked 11 am to 8 pm back then. Both Dh and DD were home asleep while I was shopping for the door buster items.
bfaddict1977 Posted October 27, 2009 Posted October 27, 2009 that story about helping that lady above really touched me. You are so sweet to help someone like that. I used to help a friend and gave her kids their entire christmas as she and her husband could never afford it. Thankfully my kids have never known the meaning of going without but I agree with some of the other posters...please remember some people have no choice but to take their kids out on bf. They aren't bad people. They need to get the deals.
jbdinos Posted October 27, 2009 Posted October 27, 2009 JBDINOS I'm SOO soory..... I should have been clearer.... aPOD means I agree with you and the rest was directed at others that think noone should bring kids. Again I soo sorry I wasn't clear when I wrote that!Gotcha My fault... didn't know what POD was... glad we got that all cleared up... I have learned something new... so today is a good day!
dmintelsgt Posted October 27, 2009 Posted October 27, 2009 People will do what they have to do... I'm not going to take sides, all I ask is that if you do take your little ones, please dress them for the weather and watch out for them. I wanted to smack one mom upside the head when her baby (they were outside the store) was dressed in nothing but a oneies! I sure hope she was shopping to buy her kid some warmer clothes!!! ] HMMM, I may have been tempted to offer help to buy her child some warmer clothes. I think lots of people on this thread have been nice to take their older children to shop. My kids got to go with me for the first time last year. They are in their 20s and able to attack stores that I want things at. Darla Yep - that just me - the big ol meanie judgemental shopper - this is why I wasn't going to post anything - I guess you had to be there with the mom dressed all warm in a nice warm coat and everything Note to self - stop posting even when you are trying to be nice about it.
cotejb Posted October 27, 2009 Posted October 27, 2009 I use to think the same way, however a few years back there was a young woman in line infront of me with a 1 year old a few people made snarky comments about it and she could hear them ( i was nto one of them) eventually she and I got to talking and I found out she and her brother were the only living members of thier family and her Husband didnt have any family either (he was raised in foster care) And not even 6 months before her Husband had been killed (army) and then her brother had been injured and lost his leg (Marines) so she really had no one and didnt know anyone really. I felt really bad for her, I asked her what she was looking for and it was mainly just the deals ont he clothes for her little girl that she really needed. I asked her for her name and number and she gave it to me, needless to say I added a nother 2 people to my list that year and we are great friends now and her daughter stays with my kids at my home on black friday.That's a really awesome story with a wonderful ending.
HansieDZ Posted October 27, 2009 Posted October 27, 2009 I use to think the same way, however a few years back there was a young woman in line infront of me with a 1 year old a few people made snarky comments about it and she could hear them ( i was nto one of them) eventually she and I got to talking and I found out she and her brother were the only living members of thier family and her Husband didnt have any family either (he was raised in foster care) And not even 6 months before her Husband had been killed (army) and then her brother had been injured and lost his leg (Marines) so she really had no one and didnt know anyone really. I felt really bad for her, I asked her what she was looking for and it was mainly just the deals ont he clothes for her little girl that she really needed. I asked her for her name and number and she gave it to me, needless to say I added a nother 2 people to my list that year and we are great friends now and her daughter stays with my kids at my home on black friday.Love this!This should be on the Happy BF thread!
starbeck96 Posted October 27, 2009 Posted October 27, 2009 My best friend usually takes her little one along, but I usually have her list also, so that her and the little one can sit in the car until right before they open the doors, and we both have our cell phones, so that we can meet in the store and update on what we have in our buggies. Her husband works weekends, and her parents go shopping that day so she has no one to leave her little one with. But I do not like to see the little babies out in the cold. I live in AL and it is usually one of our coldest days BF lol....or it is raining.
Jen08 Posted October 27, 2009 Posted October 27, 2009 I have never taken my kids out on BF. Then again I have 2 young boys and they absolutely HATE to go shopping. LOL! If my oldest son (7 yrs) wanted to go, I would spend so much time making sure he was right beside me and that no one was pushing him around just so they could get a good deal. I did see a woman in line one year with an infant in her stroller. When the doors opened, everyone just rushed in and didn't even care that their was a baby. They almost knocked them over, but my MIL grabbed her and helped shield her from everyone pushing them. My MIL even hollered at people that there was a baby there, but no one cared. I am kinda on the fence about it. I understand why some people have no choice to bring their kids, but I don't see why they have to be there at 5am and not atleast wait until 8am to get there so their kids can sleep alittle. I am lucky enough to have my DH to stay home with our boys on BF and he knows this is the 1 day out of the entire year that he can't make other plans or call me on my cell to ask when am I going to be home. LOL!
Spotted1 Posted October 28, 2009 Posted October 28, 2009 I took my youngest last year (She was 1.5) and I'll be taking her again this year. My MIL will babysit my older daughter, but the baby's another story..so she goes with. I've never stood outside in lines, we don't leave until she's already awake for the day (About 6AM anyway), and I usually only hit Walmart and Kmart. I've also never seen it get crazy like I see claimed on here. I've never had to fight crowds or get bumped into, but then again this is a really rural area with small population numbers...It's really not that big of a deal.
afrey66 Posted October 28, 2009 Posted October 28, 2009 I take my daughter shopping on BF. We don't go out early in the morning. We go when we wake up. Normally, I've hit some of the stores I wanted to go to on BF the Wednesday night before Thanksgiving so we just go in for price adjustments. However, we may end up spending some time in stores. I have her take her Leapster to keep her occupied. Also, we live in AZ so yes, it may be cold but not COLD. However, I still wonder where people shop that they get so crazy. We have been in busy situations but not insane like some of you desribe. I guess Arizonans don't get as crazy as people in other places.
Scanner420 Posted October 28, 2009 Posted October 28, 2009 I agree with the OP. And in past BF's if we couldn't get a sitter, my DW would stay home with the kids while I did the BF shopping.
arf110106 Posted October 28, 2009 Posted October 28, 2009 Last year one of my shopping buddies had to bring her 4 yr old (single mom and no sitter). I think it went ok. I was lucky hubby stayed with dd. This year since my buddies will be out of town I'll probably just have DH drop me off early to get the door busters, then later pick me up to go get breakfast with my soon to be 5 month old and soon to be 3 yr old. That way I get what I want and the babies get to sleep in. I just don't want to spend all day totally alone while shopping.
arci122 Posted October 28, 2009 Posted October 28, 2009 At what point is this considered child abuse and parents held responsible? Live in North East and many children are not even covered up properly and are yelling how cold they are!
Illinoismom Posted October 28, 2009 Posted October 28, 2009 At what point is this considered child abuse and parents held responsible? Live in North East and many children are not even covered up properly and are yelling how cold they are!that is a very callous and judgemental statement. I complain I am cold and I never seem to bundle up enough. Not everyone has the luxury of a 2 parent family, Not every one has expendable money that they can blow off trying to get their kids things. Somethimes just sometimes things are not as they appear. My 10 year complains about the cold looking for a Christmas tree, therefor he stays in the car. He would never go Black friday shopping. My other three all started going when they were 10. If I didn't have a husband to watch them and they were little and I need to save money, I would take them with me.
Jen08 Posted October 28, 2009 Posted October 28, 2009 At what point is this considered child abuse and parents held responsible? Live in North East and many children are not even covered up properly and are yelling how cold they are! I wouldn't go as far to say that its child abuse. I mean think about when it snows and its freezing outside...our kids dont' mind being out in the cold then. If people are going to take their kids then they should bundle them out well enough that they aren't to cold. If the child is an infant or even a toddler and its super cold out, then I say just wait in the car until a minute or two before the store opens and then get out.
sdigman Posted October 28, 2009 Posted October 28, 2009 Well this year our dd wants to go with she is now 10 and knows the scoop about santa.. I told her she can go, but if there is something on her list she wants I can not buy it . This may be the first year I am with out my BF shopping partner , because she will be out of state.
nikkilugi Posted October 28, 2009 Posted October 28, 2009 At what point is this considered child abuse and parents held responsible? Live in North East and many children are not even covered up properly and are yelling how cold they are!I don't think taking your kids out on BF is child abuse. The opinion of not being bundled up properly is different from one person to the next. My grandma freaks because I don't put an undershirt on the kids in the winter. Everyone has different reasons - some HAVE to do it to give their kids a Christmas and some just WANT to do it. Taking your kids shopping is not a crime - even on busy days.
luffgr8deals Posted October 28, 2009 Posted October 28, 2009 I am new to the forum, but this story made my day. People are too quick to judge. You on the other hand, my friend, are a saint. Bless you.
Jen8112 Posted October 28, 2009 Posted October 28, 2009 I would never bring an infant or toddler out to stand in lines for BF. I don't agree with people doing it even if they don't have much money and/or no one to stay home with the kids. There are other options, there are other sales beside BF, there are clearance racks. I brought DD once when she was about 2, we went to Best Buy at like 11am. It was still CRAZY in there but DD loved it! To this day, she's almost 5, every time we drive by BB she yells "Best Buy! I wanna go to Best Buy!"
inluvstill Posted October 28, 2009 Posted October 28, 2009 At what point is this considered child abuse and parents held responsible? Live in North East and many children are not even covered up properly and are yelling how cold they are!Not trying to be mean, but is it child abuse for someone to take their kids out to watch the Macy's day parade??? People wait for hours to get a good place and then the parade takes forever. How is this any different? People do what they gotta do in order to get a good deal. Should they be bundled?? Absolutely, but what does it matter if they take their kids. How does that affect you? I would not wait in the cold for hours with my children but if someone else does then that is not my concern. Of course, we do not have the knock down craziness here in our small town with Walmart, Kmart, and Biglots only.
georgiapeach717 Posted October 28, 2009 Posted October 28, 2009 my issue isnt so much the cold...even though I dont think babies/infants should be out in it for hours, but thats my opinion. Its the danger of the stampeding crowd that freaks me out with kids. It seems very dangerous.
Illinoismom Posted October 28, 2009 Posted October 28, 2009 my issue isnt so much the cold...even though I dont think babies/infants should be out in it for hours, but thats my opinion. Its the danger of the stampeding crowd that freaks me out with kids. It seems very dangerous. well with that mind set, then every disable person, every elderly person, or any one who may get shoved and pushed needs to stay home. If you use a cane, walker, wheelchair, have any artificial apendage, over the age of 30 all need to stay home, you might get trampled.
Deal Grabber Posted October 28, 2009 Posted October 28, 2009 Not everyone has the convience of having a babysitter.Who are we to judge what anyone does with their kids?I take care of me and my own and thats all anyone of us should be worried about. Oh yeah BTW you """CAN'T""" get sick from being cold.Getting sick comes from germs and germs only...
georgiapeach717 Posted October 28, 2009 Posted October 28, 2009 it is dangerous...it was dangerous when i went out pregnant...doesnt change how i feel about it, i am not trying to change anyone's mind, just lending my 2 cents as well. i havent cut anyone down or called them names, or anything like that. I just said how I feel and that I worry for the safety of the kids. Plus I think a 3 year old could be hurt a lot faster in a moshpit stampede going into target than a person in a wheel chair...but I dont want to see either happen. **shrugs**
Gporter34 Posted October 28, 2009 Posted October 28, 2009 When my kids were small, there are six of them, lol, I was lucky and didn't have to take them out. They got to stay in their nice, warm beds and by the time they woke up, I was finished. If I had not had someone to watch them, I probably would have taken them with me, as money was tight and I was trying to give them a nice Christmas. I am not going to judge anyone on this. My kids are now older and they do go with me on BF. Parenting is one of those things that everyone has different views on. I don't feel as though taking them out on BF is child abuse, I just feel that as a parent one must be extra careful anytime there are large crowds of people.
inluvstill Posted October 28, 2009 Posted October 28, 2009 When my kids were small, there are six of them, lol, I was lucky and didn't have to take them out. They got to stay in their nice, warm beds and by the time they woke up, I was finished. If I had not had someone to watch them, I probably would have taken them with me, as money was tight and I was trying to give them a nice Christmas. I am not going to judge anyone on this. My kids are now older and they do go with me on BF. Parenting is one of those things that everyone has different views on. I don't feel as though taking them out on BF is child abuse, I just feel that as a parent one must be extra careful anytime there are large crowds of people.I agree...I think my biggest fear with taking kids on BF would be just keeping a close eye on them, especially smaller ones. But again, our BF crowds are about the same as any other holiday around here, as we are such a small town. It is crowded but not to the point of trampling as some see, so my view may be different. the only view I have that does not change is.....to each his own. As others have pointed out, we all have opinions and we all parent differently and there is no wrong or right way, just what is right for you.
misstaken Posted October 28, 2009 Posted October 28, 2009 I just had a talk about BF with my kids. DS is 8 and wanted to go but I told him that he was absolutely not old enough. He was disappointed but understands. He wants to know how old he has to be before he can go! LOL! DD is 11 now and wants to go. I'm not sure that she's ready..she has no idea how bad it can get up here. In Tx, it was much friendlier crowds because we lived in a small college town with a population under 40000 and it was no colder than 50 degrees even at 3 am (she didn't go then either but was not interested). Up here, in Milwaukee, things can get really dangerous for anyone with the huge crowds and crabby freezing shoppers. How could y'all tell when your kids were old enough? If it makes any difference, she is a very small kid..about the size of a 7 year old. She's very mild and sweet which makes her an awesome kid to shop with and normally I love taking her out to the mall and lunch dates just the two of us. However, I'm wondering if she will be afraid or if I should be afraid that she will get hurt. Oh, and we would not be camping out or trying to get at TVs or anything. What do you think?
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