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what to get DH's 80-something Yr old grandmother


conj

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Ok, the woman lives alone in a retirement village. She can't go anywhere unless someone drives her... so GC usually mean one of my inlaws - who live closer- will have to take her somewhere, and i get an earful.

 

We've done GC, Craft supplies (but her eyes and hands aren't so good) we even tried a seasons lottery ticket (to which she muttered: waste of &%%# money...)

 

We've done corny jewlery boxes, pictures of the kids... all of it with luke warm response...

 

Any ideas as to what she might actually enjoy???

 

Oh - we live 3+ hours away... visiting is not much of an option...

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I'm not sure how much help this will be but every year our Walmart does an angel tree with one of the local resthomes. The things they ask for mostly are calenders, socks, lotions, and books on tape. Maybe someone else has some better ideas.
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well as much as nothing will be as good as a visit,id suggest something she can see for a while.IF the place she is in has a haIR DRESSER Come in,thats a good thing ..pay for a few..if not SEND one to her!!!!! trust that she will appreaciate that!.. it is a important thing when in those places.you never know till your in there.!! the edible thing is a ok idea if her diet is not restricted. what about flowers? does she have a phone in her room? maybe a fish tank?
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a nice, warm blanket (most of the elderly like them due to decreased circulation), socks, slippers with rubber soles, soap, shampoo, enlarged word puzzles, magnifying glass (the kind that fits a whole page), a tv with remote (and batteries) for her room, the hair dresser come see her for a day is a good idea, sugar free snacks, or maybe a basket with a few of the toiletries listed above, a warm button up sweater, sweatshirts, sweatpants, large fitting clothes, a radio/tape/cd player with a few of her favorite songs from her era...
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How about some kind of driver service once a month to take her where she wants to go. My aunt has actually done this for people. She drives them to the grocery store, the doctor, Wal-mart or wherever. She is paid by the hour. I also like the blanket idea, and I think there are places that will even put a family photo onto the blanket.
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these are all good ideas. I will ask my SIL who helps her out most of the time what she would need/want. Make sure, if we go the socks route we have a size, if we go food - we know restrictions, etc. Keep them coming, though, this is a dilemma we face every year :)
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How about a personalized books on tape .. meaning a book that is read by a family member?

 

does the retirement community provide her food? If not, a gc to a local grocery store is a good idea. Or a gift card to her local pharmacy?

 

A new pillow for her bed, or a warm bathrobe or even a "bed buddy" one of those microwavable thingies that are great for body aches.

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definitel one of those cards,i think mainly they are for birthdays but you could make your own up,that lists everything going on in the year she was born.she can have fun with that list and reminise about the things back then and the prices. a portable radio my mom used to have one all the time if she has access to a vcr make a tape of everyone so she can see you all year round
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My late husband's grandmother was very difficult to buy for. We usually gave her food or gift certificates for her favorite grocery store. One of the gifts she liked and used the most was a set of nice assorted greeting cards plus a book of postage stamps.
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I did the greeting cards and postage stamps for my husband's late grandmother one year (which I thought was a good idea!) and she promptly told me that her eyes were getting too bad to write to people! :)

I still think it's a great idea, though. Also, how about flannel sheets for her bed?

yup, sounds like they are related! :) I know she is not the one who writes cards at this point...

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How about a donation in her name to the charity or group of her choice? Or a "purchase" in her name from Heifer International? That's a gift that will keep on giving, and she can't complain that it's a waste of money =)

You'd think she couldn't complain... but she would find a way... :( She is honestly the most unhappy person I know. From the stories I've heard, this has nothing to do with age

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Sounds like your DH's grandmother is related to my dad! :rolleyes: There are a lot of good suggestions here already... but based on my experiences, here's what I would probably do: find out what she does most days to occupy her time, as well as what she likes to do on "special" occasions... ask your SIL and/or other caretakers what she can always use more of... Do you (or other relatives) know something she is (or used to be) sentimental about? Then, take all these ideas (and any others you may come up with) to Wal-Mart, Target, Dollar Store, or wherever and start looking for things (big or small) that would fit into her life. You may end up with one gift or with a collection of small gifts combined into one. Or you may see something at a store that gives you an idea for something more personalized (like some of the other ideas posted here).

 

What I've found is, with people like my dad or your DH's grandmother, it doesn't matter how original/unique/expensive your gift is-- they may or may not seem to appreciate it when you give it to them... BUT if it's something that fits into their lives in a real way, they'll appreciate it more than you may ever know and will actually get enjoyment out of it. And isn't that what gift-giving is all about: showing our love and appreciation in a more meaningful, concrete way? :)

 

Hope this helps....

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sometimes the little things can be great..a basket of items? i gave my roomate a magnifyingglass set when i was in the place i was stuck,and you would have thought i gave her a million $. she used this thing to read her bible and sat by the window for light..i still would think somethign pamperign liek the hair cut(and many of these places have a hairdresser come in ,all you have to do is arrange payment to them.) she will get to show it off,and the staff and other patients will amke comments.Of the 3-4 months i spent in one of those places,the thing i appreaciate the most was 1 visitors!! 2 someone getting me internet connection and bringing in a lap top(so i could come on here and try to pass time) and 3 the apt with the hair dresser,and im not even an old lady!
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  • 2 weeks later...
I don't know about your grandmother but definitely socks or slippers with the treads on them... But blankets are a good idea to. But also maybe a clock radio with the large numbers on them. You might have to set it and tune it into the station in the area that has the music that she likes. It would give her something to listen to that could be like company. Cookies and candy can sometimes be bad for older people because of Diabetic and health concerns. Also sometimes a good powder. House dresses are sometimes a good thing easy to get on and take off and they are not to binding. Hard candy is also a good idea (Sugar-Free are always an option). They keep your mouth from drying out. An area nursing home that I know of has someone come through and fix hair for the residents. You could always pay for an extra service from them. They would always cut their hair for free but to get a permanent or something extra it costs.
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