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How do you Explain to your kids...


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#1 dmmiller  OFFLINE  

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Posted Nov 17, 2008 - 10:15 am

Why other kids get more from Santa than they do?

My kids are probably in they're last year of believing in santa.. but they are still
old enough to notice that other kids get more/less than they do. With the economy the
way its been lately, and people trying to not overdo it.. how would you explain to your
kids after xmas if they noticed and were upset cuz Santa didnt give them as much as
johnny down the street?

#2 princez916  OFFLINE  

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Posted Nov 17, 2008 - 10:22 am

At my house Santa only brings one special gift, the rest is from mom and dad. I'm not sure how you do it. Kids understand more than you think. I think if you tell them Santa brought them "x", whatever it was they wanted the most, and let them know times are hard for your family right now and you just don't have as much money this year to buy presents. Maybe remind them on how they get little presents all through the year.
"A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort." :D :cheesy:

#3 vsa3janes  OFFLINE  

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Posted Nov 17, 2008 - 10:38 am

Funny, thinking back as a kid I don't remember anyone getting more or less than me (even my siblings). I only remember the gift(s) I really wanted being under the tree. I just always told my daughter that she should make a list and Santa would decide what he thought she should really have. I was a poor, divorced mom with no outside help. She was always pleased with her gifts and said she never thought about kids getting more than her. Maybe as a mom you are just worrying about something they won't even give a thought to. I know I do that.

#4 scrabbler  OFFLINE  

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Posted Nov 17, 2008 - 10:42 am

I think that if they are noticing that, then perhaps Santa is just seen as a big gift giver and doesn't include the beauty of the Season.

#5 dmmiller  OFFLINE  

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Posted Nov 17, 2008 - 10:51 am

Yeah, i'm probably just worrying over nothing.. :) I'm just wanting to downsize the amount we give them, and we have spoiled them so much in the past. Maybe I'll just give them less Mom & dad gifts and keep the santa gifts the same.

#6 debbiedana  OFFLINE  

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Posted Nov 17, 2008 - 12:09 pm

My daughter who was 8 at the time said somthing to me when we were wrapping gifts for the kids we picked from the Giving Tree. She said "why do we have to help Santa with this stuff? Can't he just bring extra to poor kids?" (I should state that she was just trying to figure it out, not being snotty about giving to those less fortunate)

I told her Santa was taking care of the necessities, like soap and toothpaste and underwear and food, things that we take for granted, and we are helping Santa out so those kids can get presents too.

I got her even more excited that we were helping Santa. She's really into Christmas charities and food pantries this year.

I don't think she's noticed that some kids get more expensive things from Santa than she does, and she is a bright and observant nine year old.

#7 First Lady  OFFLINE  

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Posted Nov 17, 2008 - 12:22 pm

Growing up Santa only brought 1 gift each, the rest were form mom and dad. It was easier to explain to us that mom and dad did not have alot of money to bring lots of gifts, than explain Santa didn't have the money. We could see in our daily lives that money was short, especially when my dad was laid off and then we had some major medical problems with half our family. I have continued the same in our house. Santa brings 1 (maybe 2) presents and the rest are from mom and dad. I've never heard from kids that other kids get more presents from Santa then they do.

#8 Mikesgirl  OFFLINE  

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Posted Nov 17, 2008 - 12:24 pm

Santa in my house only brings 1 thing per person and yes santa visits Dh and my mom... Santa brings the kids something big usually like for DS12 a Tony Hawk skateboard and DD8 the new HSM3 doll house thing.. Now also in my house the first time the kids say they don't believe in Santa, Santa will no longer leave a present for them.. My DD8 was around 3 and asked me why Santa didnt leave presents for her Mama or DH because they were good too, so Santa just leaves them a dvd or something small...

#9 saiynee  OFFLINE  

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Posted Nov 17, 2008 - 12:26 pm

I told her Santa was taking care of the necessities, like soap and toothpaste and underwear and food, things that we take for granted, and we are helping Santa out so those kids can get presents too.


Wow, what an awesome way to explain it. I'll have to remember this for when my girls start asking.

I know I over do the gifts, but some are from Santa and some are from mommy and daddy.

#10 sneakers1234  OFFLINE  

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Posted Nov 17, 2008 - 1:06 pm

I tell them, "in life, there will always be someone richer, smarter better than you, just do your best. same goes for Christmas gifts, someone will always get more but so what." DS 8 is pretty convinced there is no Santa and I already told him things would be tight this year with job worries. I said one gift and he picked mario sluggers for wii. I was thinking of a DS so we'll see.

#11 loves30  OFFLINE  

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Posted Nov 17, 2008 - 2:19 pm

in my house my two littles ones ds9 and ds 5 still think its santa that brings them. but they have always known that i pay santa for them. that nothing is free. they never complain that they got to little cause they always get alot. and most times only one or two things that they wanted. but in my house its u have to beleave in the spirit or u get nothing. u must want to help u must want to give u must want to be thankfull holidays at my house are not just family. the door is open to anyone. i have had friends of my siblings over and we have always enjoyed the holiday . we have a friend that would rather come here for the holidays and does . he says we are more his family then his family. and he is here for every occasion. so i call him my brother cause i have known him not for like 20 yrs.

#12 pogiporkchop  OFFLINE  

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Posted Nov 17, 2008 - 3:52 pm

DS7 and DD5 still think it's all Santa too. They are always happy with whatever they receive, but this year DD has gotten the "I wants" and has completely forgot why we celebrate the season (which I've explained to both already). Now a few nights ago we were in a WM and they asked what the tree with all the tags on it was. I told them how some kids might not have a Christmas without the help of others. Almost not a single peep out of them for the entire time we were in that store... they were deep in thought about what I had said. So I find out about a Christmas wish contest via an area radio station... when asked what they wished for (because I wanted to make the wish for them) they said they wanted to go shopping - so others could have a good Christmas. I hope their wish is one of the selected ones. Even so, they're still looking forward to putting coins in the kettles and just maybe we'll be able to get a couple of tags off the Angel Tree. They are now immersed in the true spirit and meaning of the season :)

#13 tokanm  OFFLINE  

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Posted Nov 17, 2008 - 5:02 pm

When DS was little his Best friend came from his parents being divorced and all the grandparents were divorced and remarried. Everyone tried to "outdo" everyone else at Christmas :eek: If Mom bought a bike..Dad would buy a motorized ride on. All the grandparents did the same thing..it was ridiculous and none of these people are rich they just wanted to show up the other guy..it was not about the kids or Christmas it was about adults being children :( My son would come home in tears that Santa liked John better than him as he got so much stuff. My son was crushed and would say "I was such a good boy all year" and he really was such a sweet kid. It was so frustrating and I just could not/would not try to keep up with the Joneses so to speak. I am not exagerating when I tell you these kids would get a couple of thousand dollars worth of toys at Christmas. I would tell him they were from family and not all from Santa but it is hard to explain when you are 6 years old :( I am happy to report that DS survived this "trauma" and is well adjusted..his old friend..not so much :o

#14 mrs.winter  OFFLINE  

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Posted Nov 17, 2008 - 9:33 pm

half of them are from Santa and half from Mom And Dad i wrap them and then put a tag on it there are no certain ones because they are all special gifts!That was how it was when i was growing up ! My kids are 13,9,5 & 17 months needless to say the 13 year old doesnt believe anymore so he helps alot like letting the younger ones know that if you dont believe then Santa doesnt come anymore! i dont think I have ever had any of them tell me so and so get this or that!thank goodness

#15 jeninpa  OFFLINE  

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Posted Nov 17, 2008 - 10:30 pm

My sisters kids don't get much but my kids never really asked,lol. I think that they think it is because they aren't bad like them,lol. (They are bad & whiny!) They told me that they don't get $5.00 for a tooth but only $1.00 and it must be because they have cavities in them,lol.
"Laughter is timeless, imagination has no age, dreams are forever." - Tinkerbell

#16 dmmiller  OFFLINE  

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Posted Nov 18, 2008 - 3:58 am

When DS was little his Best friend came from his parents being divorced and all the grandparents were divorced and remarried. Everyone tried to "outdo" everyone else at
Christmas :eek: If Mom bought a bike..Dad would buy a motorized ride on. All the grandparents did the same thing..it was ridiculous and none of these people are rich
they just wanted to show up the other guy..it was not about the kids or Christmas it was about adults being children :(

My son would come home in tears that Santa liked John better than him as he got so much
stuff. My son was crushed and would say "I was such a good boy all year" and he really was such a sweet kid. It was so frustrating and I just could not/would not try to keep up with
the Joneses so to speak. I am not exagerating when I tell you these kids would get a couple of thousand dollars worth of toys at Christmas. I would tell him they were from family and
not all from Santa but it is hard to explain when you are 6 years old :(

I am happy to report that DS survived this "trauma" and is well adjusted..his old friend..not so much :o



Glad to hear your son bounced back okay. :) I'm sure if it would happen, it would only upset them for a few minutes. :tongue1:

#17 jarerice  OFFLINE  

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Posted Nov 18, 2008 - 4:59 am

Thats a tough one, but I know my kids, as soon as they see whats under that tree, the forget everything else they thought they wanted. I have always told my kids to be happy with what that have. Some kids have less, others have more and that does not affect you in any way.

#18 littlesdcen  OFFLINE  

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Posted Nov 18, 2008 - 7:57 am

At our house. Santa is the big giver. Mom and Dad give a couple presents each. Mainly shoes and clothes(the non fun stuff). My kids know that Santa clears everything through mom and mom and dad do pay for all the extras Santa brings.(Nothing is free) I will not take the magic out of it as they will know soon enough.(what a sad day) But as long as they never voice it Santa will always be welcome at our house.

#19 lelee24  OFFLINE  

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Posted Nov 18, 2008 - 5:01 pm

We went through this last year at our house when my son asked why we bought for "poor" kids when Santa brought gifts to all kids. So I told him that even though Santa brings things the parents still have to foot the bill. So he asked why since the elves made the toys...I told him that used to be true but with all the high tech stuff nowadays the elves had to depend on Target and WalMart, etc. to get some of the stuff and it cost money of course. He accepted this....and really enjoyed helping buy and wrap for others. It also stopped the questions....he also knows you have to believe to receive!
I love the whole Black Friday Season!::yup:

#20 JohnnyLaRue  OFFLINE  

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Posted Nov 18, 2008 - 7:27 pm

My grandparents who raised me came from the old USSR. I remember getting upset since other kids had more than I did. I remember shoveling driveways and waking up early to scrape car windows for people in the neighborhood for cash just to buy hockey gear. One of many pieces of advice I got from them was: И хо́чется и ко́лется - roughly translated: The items you desire in life should not come easy (you won't appreciate them as much)

#21 casey49781  OFFLINE  

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Posted Dec 7, 2008 - 3:21 am

My kids never know what there going to get on Christmas morning, sometimes I spend a ton and sometimes I dont. That just teaches them to be thankful for what they get, it all depends on the budget. My kids are starting to ask about santa, there, dd11 and ds8, I told them if they dont believe they get nothing, end of conversation. Here santa brings one or two things and the rest is from mom. When they really quite believing, we will help out in toys for tots, go and collect items, and wash toys to help make others kids happy at Christmas,

#22 teach2nuts  OFFLINE  

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Posted Dec 7, 2008 - 8:45 am

My 7 year old son still believes in Santa and he is an only child. With him being an only child he does get more than an average child down the road. However, we have always done a Samaritan box for a less fortunate child. This year we are helping out a child in our church. My son looks forward to helping out someone each year and has come to expect our family to do this tradition together. I explained to him when he was old enough to understand that you can only ask Santa for two things. If you get more than two things you have received a special treat from Santa. Each year he gets excited because Santa leaves extra things for him. Don't ruin the holiday with making Christmas a competion with the neighbors or classmates. Christmas is a special time of the year!!

#23 haynlele06  OFFLINE  

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Posted Dec 7, 2008 - 9:39 pm

Umm im not sure my kids are 4 and 2 so right now they dont know what comes from who... They think everything comes from santa....

#24 fluffkin79  OFFLINE  

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Posted Dec 8, 2008 - 7:27 pm

How long do kids really believe in Santa, anyways? 8, 10 years max? For most of those years, don't most kids ask for reasonable things? I know that mine did. DD5 really wants a Dora Mermaid doll (on sale for $10ish), DD3 wants a Birthday Cake for herself and some cars to give to her little brother (she made my heart melt when she asked Santa for something to give to her brother:2cloud9:), DS2 wants a truck. How can they complain that Santa brought little Billy so much more when they get exactly what they ask for? DD5 did say that she wanted an American Girl doll, a Butterscotch pony, and a cupcake maker. I asked her if she thought she had been good enough to deserve the big gifts (we know better!) and told her that Santa knew parents as well as he knew kids and wouldn't bring a gift that the parents don't approve of (cupcake maker).

#25 dd50  OFFLINE  

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Posted Dec 8, 2008 - 8:04 pm

When my DD was 10 I had quit my job a few months before and couldn't find a job because I made to much money on the old one. I was a single mother. When Christmas rolled around I evened up going to a $2 - 3 store. It was before the dollar stores. I had green stamps that I had never used and got her some things there. I was so nervous because all the other years she got more than she needed. She didn't even say anything. I think most kids are grateful for what they get and we think it should always be more.

#26 Rockfordmom  OFFLINE  

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Posted Dec 8, 2008 - 8:19 pm

How do your kids know how much Johnny down the street got? It's not like Johnny keeps all of his presents from Santa together in a pile and shows other kids everything that he got? Don't kids ask eachother "what did you get for christmas?" and then just name off a couple of things and not their entire list?

#27 erinplus3  OFFLINE  

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Posted Dec 8, 2008 - 8:28 pm

How do your kids know how much Johnny down the street got? It's not like Johnny keeps all of his presents from Santa together in a pile and shows other kids everything that he got? Don't kids ask eachother "what did you get for christmas?" and then just name off a couple of things and not their entire list?


This is generally true with my DD6, but I have noticed that there are always some of the snobby kids who have to brag about every little thing they have. She'll tell me that Susie has a plasma TV in her room, Lulu has her own cell phone, and Judy has an iPod. :rolleyes:

In our house we stress the emphasis on being thankful for what we have, whether it's the latest and greatest toy or a new coloring book. We also tell them that Santa can't bring some kids toys because they might need a new coat more than a new toy if their family is struggling and can't afford to provide all the necessities that year.

#28 conj  OFFLINE  

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Posted Dec 9, 2008 - 2:36 am

it is not new that kids talk about what they got at christmas. My theory - shared upon request - is that Santa has soooo many houses to get to for all the people that believe that we like to help him out to lessen his load. We already help provide food and clothing to those who need it... and we pass along - for free - clothes that we've outgrown.. Santa brings toys. Grown-ups provide the needs.... Santa brings the wants. we never give the gift to the kids in question... we bring them to a drop off spot of some sort. I'm sure the elves are thankful for the help. ** I should say - we are Jewish. There is no Santa coming to my house.. however, smart clairvoyant little bugger that he is - he knows my kids go visit Papa at Christmas and *he* celebrates Xmas, so Santa brings them each a present there. 1 present. usually something mom and dad would never ever buy you.
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Knowledge does not dissolve integrity - Conj

#29 jcarr492  OFFLINE  

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Posted Dec 9, 2008 - 2:58 am

Our kids only get one gift each from Santa. My oldest, dd10, knows about Santa as of last Christmas(and the tooth fairy) because she just had way too many questions and was figuring it out. Her sister, dd9, doesn't know yet..but I think by next year she will..she is approaching the age of dd10 with the questioning now. DS3 has a long time before he knows. But all the gifts come from mom & dad and one one gift for each from santa..something that was an important want on their list.

#30 amberjobryant  OFFLINE  

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Posted Dec 9, 2008 - 10:57 am

my answer may seem a little cruel to some, but when asked this question of why another kid gets more from santa, I explain that child probally was not very good and its parents where afraid that santa wouldn't visit their child this year so they bought gifts too and pretended they where from santa, they usually except this because usually the kids that brag are the spoiled ones that are not very nice and thier parents get them everything they ask for.




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