ilikefree Posted November 14, 2012 Share Posted November 14, 2012 I've always LOVED Christmas, everything from putting up the tree, lights, decorations, shopping, music, tv shows, presents...everything! The last couple years, however, dh and 2 sons (19 & 13 this year) just brought me down, complaining when it comes time to put up the tree and decorate. DH and younger son will help IF I ASK, but if I ask my older son, he grumbles, complains and does what I ask then disappears. I'm just dreading it this year. Last year I put the tree up by myself while they were at work and school. DH did say it looked nice, but that's about it. I'm thinking about not even putting anything up this year, just waiting to see if THEY ask anything about it. We always used to have Christmas at my parents' house until my mom got sick, then a few years ago we started doing Christmas here. Last year we had to beg my mom and dad to come over, this year I KNOW they won't come because of my mom's sickness. My grandma who usually comes is in a nursing home (she's 91) so she won't be able to come over. It'll just be my family and my 2 sisters and their families. We have Christmas here because it's centralized for everyone. Maybe I just need a kick in the pants to get myself in the mood this year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elmck Posted November 14, 2012 Share Posted November 14, 2012 Don't let the Scrooges bring you down. Maybe you can figure out a way to decorate by yourself but make easier on yourself. Do you have nieces and nephews who would want to help. Or have a tree decorating party with some friends and everyone brings a dish. You could go get some 3 or 4 ft trees and put them up at the nursing home for your grandma, or your parents house. It might have to be different but it can still be a time of joy!! So here is you kick just incase you need it!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Princess7915 Posted November 14, 2012 Share Posted November 14, 2012 Sorry. It's tough when you love it and you have people that don't. I am lately of the Scrooge camp - but I haven't always been, I was the one who had them around me. I guess my only advice is to do what you love for you and don't worry about them - or at least as much as you can. At some point teenage boys will be teenage boys and hate everything But on some level you know they would miss it. You can always go with the whole theory of those who dislike being in the holiday spirit and don't want to participate can always "sit out" Christmas morning as well. See how far that gets you. But I think you want them to participate because they want to. Maybe find some new stuff? Maybe things just seem a bit lackluster? How about a holiday cookie baking day (boys love to eat!) Or a family movie day - some kind or outing let them suggest something and even bring a friend. Do you have any kind of outdoor ice skating around? Cut down your own tree somewhere that's manly. If you don't decorate the outside of the house with lights maybe the men of the family would like to do that - BF deals on lights make it cheap. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ilikefree Posted November 14, 2012 Author Share Posted November 14, 2012 So here is you kick just incase you need it!! Thanks, I needed that!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ilikefree Posted November 14, 2012 Author Share Posted November 14, 2012 All great ideas...thanks! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Promom Posted November 14, 2012 Share Posted November 14, 2012 Put your santa hat on, make yourself some christmas cookies, turn up the christmas music and decorate for you!! And any time anyone complains just ring a bell at them or tell them that santa will take a present away for every complaint. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peppysfireball Posted November 14, 2012 Share Posted November 14, 2012 Its like that here too. My son is 15 and getting the tree was always something the kids did with their dad. He wont do it anymore and lasy year they kept asking where the rest of the tree was. I bought a nice expensive rotating one after xmas last year, but I will be the only one decorating since my son let his kids move away. They always made it fun. My grandma died in Jan at age 93 and my mom gripes all the time about shopping and nobody being there. Well. I guess me and my 3 kids and their kids dont count. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tdanette Posted November 14, 2012 Share Posted November 14, 2012 Just mention that since no one cares to help decorate anymore, no one cares to buy presents either. HA! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kanyon71 Posted November 14, 2012 Share Posted November 14, 2012 If you have a spare room you could put up all your stuff in there and then forbid them to enter the room during the holiday season. Explain to them that even though the holiday seems to lack importance to them it still holds a great deal for you. If they would like to celebrate the holiday with you then suggest that THEY move things to the place they belong and if not tell them that their presents are at the store when they care to go buy them for themselves. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mgmckny Posted November 14, 2012 Share Posted November 14, 2012 I've always LOVED Christmas, everything from putting up the tree, lights, decorations, shopping, music, tv shows, presents...everything! The last couple years, however, dh and 2 sons (19 & 13 this year) just brought me down, complaining when it comes time to put up the tree and decorate. DH and younger son will help IF I ASK, but if I ask my older son, he grumbles, complains and does what I ask then disappears. I'm just dreading it this year. Last year I put the tree up by myself while they were at work and school. DH did say it looked nice, but that's about it. I'm thinking about not even putting anything up this year, just waiting to see if THEY ask anything about it. We always used to have Christmas at my parents' house until my mom got sick, then a few years ago we started doing Christmas here. Last year we had to beg my mom and dad to come over, this year I KNOW they won't come because of my mom's sickness. My grandma who usually comes is in a nursing home (she's 91) so she won't be able to come over. It'll just be my family and my 2 sisters and their families. We have Christmas here because it's centralized for everyone. Maybe I just need a kick in the pants to get myself in the mood this year.I understand. Mine aren't exactly Scrooge but they aren't overly excited lately and this year I'm struggling. I'm thinking of doing a small table top live tree and some small stuff. My mom is not well and dh is disabled and can't help, the boys are busy or don't want to. I want a tree but my back groans at the thought of doing it myself this year... Going to see how expensive a smaller tree is... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leefamily23 Posted November 15, 2012 Share Posted November 15, 2012 My son, now 19, went through this too. It was always a family affair to decorate the tree/house. The last few years, it's been just me. I stopped forcing him because he just wasn't into it. My dh does the outside lights while I do the tree now. I just turn up the holiday music and go to town. It's not the same, and I'll love all my memories of ds and I doing it together. Time just changes things though and I accept that (plus I am hanging onto the fact that someday--and I mean WELL down the road) I will have grandkids to share some new holiday memories with. Until then I just embrace the things he does still want to participate in and have learned to accept he's growing up and kind of has his own life in regards to the others. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevierocks Posted November 16, 2012 Share Posted November 16, 2012 this seems to happen everywhere.. know your not alone. it seems eventually they do find christmas spirit .maybe years awaY though. it happened with kids here..they became teenagers and no interest in what use to be very involved christmas..like setting up a tree was actually a fight..not pleasant. again there is a movie about this.. im not sure of the name...the woman goes on strike for christmas...many others follow suit...ect. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
racerfan Posted November 16, 2012 Share Posted November 16, 2012 I know how you feel. DS16 mentioned 2 weekends ago that we should get a fake tree since it is less "messy" DH and I just looked at him and said NO. Xmas is the one holiday I go all out. I love Christmas and decorate accordingly. DH does the outside and helps me with the inside (he does the tree) DD at least still likes Christmas and will help, but I am sure there will come a time when she will stop and make comments. 3 days ago I told DS that we will be starting the decorating this weekend. He was not happy. I told him no decorating then no gifts "Santa can't find our house if it is not decorated" He knows what that means. Right after he emailed me his list and started getting into my excitement. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevierocks Posted November 16, 2012 Share Posted November 16, 2012 the movie is actually called "on strike for christmas.' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ilikefree Posted November 18, 2012 Author Share Posted November 18, 2012 This won't be much of a Thanksgiving, BF or Christmas for us. My grandma just passed away last night. She always enjoyed looking at our tree, lights and decorations so I will be decorating our house for her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mgmckny Posted November 18, 2012 Share Posted November 18, 2012 This won't be much of a Thanksgiving, BF or Christmas for us. My grandma just passed away last night. She always enjoyed looking at our tree, lights and decorations so I will be decorating our house for her.So sorry for your loss. Hold on to the happy memories... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pogiporkchop Posted November 19, 2012 Share Posted November 19, 2012 Thoughts will be with you. Condolences on your loved one's passing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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