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Cruddy Christmas Gifts


Finnegan

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Ok gals and guys... one of the threads on here got me thinking about lousy Christmas gifts I have been given or others in my family have been given. I really need a good giggle so, any contributers welcome:

 

Me - from my beloved husband our first year of marriage - EVERYTHING from Ames (now out of business but for those of you who don't know, it was a lot like Kmart). Slippers, nightgown, housecoat, and jewelry box. All from Ames. What did he think I was... his grandmother???

 

From my mother in law: one Christmas: A photo album for 3.5 X5 prints. Please keep in mind that she is perfectly aware that I ONLY print 4X6 inch prints.

 

My sister on her 24th Christmas, from the man she loved (and she was hoping for an engagement ring) - A sweater box full of glass figurine animals like birds and things. She actually bawled and left the room. Oh, there was also a cowboy hat and "Wild and Wonderful West Virginia" tee shirt. Please Note: My sister is not in the least 'country'. She is more hip hop.

 

my neice and nephews - THIS CHRISTMAS - tee shirts, a ball cap, and stickers (ps the stickers were wrapped in tissue paper and noted to be "handle with care" for some crazy reason) with the logo "Its a Good Life". We looked it up and it's some sort of charity. I mean, this was on the same level as George Castanza's gift to his coworkers on Seinfeld where he pledged money to a fictitious charity. And, these gifts came from a very well-healed aunt and uncle.

 

Ok, anyone else?

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Okay here we go.....

 

As a teenager......uncle gave me and my sister birds. Yep, birds. Tweeked all nite. Lasted about a week until we gave them away.

 

A few years later..same uncle....Mexican ponchos

 

While dating my now husband.....future MIL gave me a Totes babushka....keep in mind this was late 80's with the BIG hair......and I was about 23.

 

Can't wait to hear others......

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Sorry, I couldn't stop laughing at the mexican ponchos... it also reminded me of one more...

 

 

When I was 4, my sisters 6 and 10, my aunt gave us all leather pocketbooks. Just like you would see your grandmother carting around. They were ugly brown and black with big brass buckles on the front. My mother had a hard time keeping a tight smile on her face while simultaneously grimacing a silent "don't you dare say anything mean" to us three flabbergasted girls... :eyepoppin

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You could ask just about anyone I have ever given a gift to. I would rather have a root canal than try to choose a gift for someone. It's a skill I totally lack, and I know it. It got to the point where my wife, who is the kindest and most loving person you'd ever meet, finally told me to stop buying her gifts. Chocolate for her birthday and V-day is OK, though.
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The worst I ever saw was given to a teacher. She collected frogs and someone went to Mexico and brought her back OK are you ready. Basically it was a laquered up taxidermy frog! Oh yeah, I forgot to mention they had it turned into a purse for her. Wasn't that lovely. I have never ever seen such grace shown by a woman to that kid. She cooed over it and after school her and I talked and she was like "What else was I supposed to do? How do you respond to one of those!" It was hysterical. Made every teacher I ever told that story to glad to receive another "World's greatest teacher" coffee mug.
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My husband bought me the ugliest sweater I have ever seen. He learned to never buy me clothes again. Did I mention that it had reindeer on it, was 2 sizes too small and he thought it was cool?

But he made it up to me next year with a mothers ring with my kids birthstones on it. Sneaky little sucker.

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So, this is not my cruddy gift, but my cousin's. Last year her mom gave her a roll of quarters, a pack of country ham (held 4 THINLY sliced pieces) and gave her the ticket from the gas station in which she had charged batteries (for my cousin's childrens' gifts) on my cousin's in-store account on her way to her house. So in total, she got 4 slices of thinly sliced country ham!!
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I dont think i have any really cruddy gifts other than usual MIL gifts she always buys clothes that she would wear and ive told year after year not to buy me clothes that i have plenty.. But it never fails theres always a big box of clothes that sits in my room until i find someone who wants them.
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My mother in law has NEVER bought a gift for my husband nor myself.... Every year we watch his brother open a gift while we sit.. We've never said anything, but I've always wondered why she always skipped my husband (I never expect anything for myself). I just feel bad for my husband. We've been married for 10 years and for 10 years we've watched his single brother open 3-4 gifts from her. Sad really.

 

 

My husband the first year we were married bought me a sexy pajama set. It was so small I looked at him and said only with a tummy tuck and full lipo. lol. Im a xlarge and he got me a small. lol

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My mother in law has NEVER bought a gift for my husband nor myself.... Every year we watch his brother open a gift while we sit.. We've never said anything, but I've always wondered why she always skipped my husband (I never expect anything for myself). I just feel bad for my husband. We've been married for 10 years and for 10 years we've watched his single brother open 3-4 gifts from her. Sad really.

 

 

My husband the first year we were married bought me a sexy pajama set. It was so small I looked at him and said only with a tummy tuck and full lipo. lol. Im a xlarge and he got me a small. lol

I really wish she wouldnt buy anything for me and i do appreciate the thought which is really what counts but i cant believe your MIL buys for one son and not the other thats weird. I would understand if she didnt buy for either but to buy for one and not the other is like a smack in the face to your husband...

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Okay, this guy I have been dating for about a month shows up at my house to take me to a Christmas party and says "Here I got you something for Christmas, I don't know what it is though..." and hands me an alligator Webkinz. I am 52! I am not especially into alligators. I have not had an interest in stuffed animals in at least 30 years. My dd 12, however, was sitting on the couch when he gave it and flipped out because she has been asking for webkinz for Christmas (she's not particularly into alligators either). I thought the whole thing was weird, way to impress a girl "I got you something...don't know what it is though!" Weird!
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yes, the younger brother is your baby. She could at least buy him a small token. Its now a joke (what else can you do but laugh) between my husband and I to guess how many presents she bought him... She always says its because he doesn't do as well as my husband and I. Thats bull because he bring in over $55 K a year. And hes single.
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O gosh where do I begin? Was it the novelty 3ft TV remote I got last year? Maybe the year I got a Japanese shirt (in hiragana) that they had no idea what it said but it looked cool. Since this is a PG forum lets just say it was not something I would wear in public. The year I got a a box of popcorn from the chick I was dating. the time I got a 6 pack of beer with 3 missing. the time I got a carton of smokes (even though i quit smoking many years ago). A lunchbox which I found odd.

 

Hooray for the person who invented gift cards....

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So, this is not my cruddy gift, but my cousin's. Last year her mom gave her a roll of quarters, a pack of country ham (held 4 THINLY sliced pieces) and gave her the ticket from the gas station in which she had charged batteries (for my cousin's childrens' gifts) on my cousin's in-store account on her way to her house. So in total, she got 4 slices of thinly sliced country ham!!

wow holy moly! that is amazing!
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We won't count the attempts at clothes my husband has made, he did try. But the year we bought the house (our second Christmas married), he bought me a ceiling fan and a double boiler. I had admired the fan when we were first buying the house as it matched our fireplace (never said I wanted one, in those days I was always cold). And I had made a cookie that year that used a double boiler and I had to improvise.

 

My mil finally quit buying me clothes after I had to return all of them as they didn't fit or were vests that I would never wear.

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One year MIL gave me a set of ornaments that they had given out free at Kohls on BF. The next year she gave dh $100 each of our boys $75 and me $20. All the while spending LOTS more on her daughter and her kids. My kids never understood why their cousins got more. Now she doesn't give anyone in our family anything cause we no longer talk to her.
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My now ex SIL got my DS (who was about 6 at the time) a dog toy..yep :eek:

It was a squeaky ball with bumps all over it..and it was purple even. He looked so sad

I was just glad he had other real gifts.

I wanted to say to her 'what the hell where you thinking?" We didn't have a dog and clearly

the tag read from some canine adventures company :eyepoppin

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Many years ago when I was a teenager, my aunt had given me A HANGER for Christmas! YES, 1 HANGER! LOL Now, it was one of those hangers that are for pajamas, lingerie, etc. as in it was padded, wrapped with satin and had the ribbon around it? You know the ones Im talking about. I guess they are sold individually because I got ONE! LOL
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:sidesplit

 

Thanks for the laughs this morning. :sidesplit

 

 

Dh gave me a book one year with a few dollars in it. The book wouldn't have been so bad if it was something I would have read.

 

My step-MIL gave me a knitted hat, mittens (yes I said mittens..lol) and scarf set in a lovely shade of green. DH laughed his butt off at the look on my face when I opened it. I regifted it to my mom and she loved it. lol

 

When Dh was younger and before we met, he made up a surprise gift bag for a friend. He put in a tampon, spiral notebook that had been used, cigarette coupons, an electric razor and some other odds and ends with a little cash. The guy came back and told him that the electric razor grabbed his face and pinched it when he tried using it. LOL.

 

I don't really get cruddy gifts from my family. They usually ask me what I want and will pick from a list. The step-MIL has now started sending gift cards...thank god. I do get some cruddy gifts from work sometimes but I'll give them to my mom and she regifts them to friends. Well, I wouldn't really call them cruddy...just stuff I wouldn't use.

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Most of the gifts I received from my grandma and aunt on my dad's side weren't something I would especially use - most were from Dollar General - but I know it was all my grandma and aunt could afford and I loved them for that reason alone. Recently I sold quite a few unopened in a garage sale :) I did keep them for many years but I have been on a purging kick lately.

 

Now one gift I just didn't understand was given to my dh and I about 7 years ago. I had just started consulting with Creative Memories and had just gotten big into scrapbooking. I had vowed to get rid of all of my albums and move everything into scrapbooks. Well my MIL got my dh and I a personalized photo album from Lillian Vernon. It was the kind that holds the pics individually in the plastic sleeves. The funny thing is that she knew about my scrapbooking because she had been to a couple of my parties and she knew I was trying to get rid of all my albums and move to scrapbooks.

 

Another - when I was around 16 or so my mom and dad bought me a Lane chest. I was so disappointed that year because I never ever thought of a chest and had no idea what on earth I would use it for. I do still have the chest and it still has stuff from when I was in high school, LOL. One day I will give it to my dd - but not as a christmas gift, LOL.

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These are soo funny... I love hearing about other people's lives... makes mine seem bearable:)

 

Here is mine:

The year DH and I got engaged future MIL gave me a book on "How to be a good wife and an even better woman":eyepoppin

It had tips on how to "please" your man properly.. cooking, cleaning, and when to "know" your place as a wife.

The book was printed in 1942 and is now in a landfill:yup:

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One year on the day my family had Christmas, the weather was rather bad and my dh had to work so my kids and I drove about 2 hours through some questionable weather. I received $1.50 in quarters and a spooner. I also received a gift certificate to a mall that was 2 hours from my home.

 

All the way home, I cried while explaining to my kids that it doesn't matter what gift was given. I think my nerves were fried from the bad weather and the guilt of feeling I should show up and all I had to show for it was a $1.50 in quarters and a spooner.

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Well I cant even think of just one to talk about. My MIL ALWAYS buys me something to clean with or something I detest. Some kind of scrubber that is entirely to ruff for my tubs and showers. Then one time a frog to sit in the yard.(I HATE FROGS). A cheap vaccum. ( Hello I have a Dyson). Anyone want to guess what kind of cleaning product I will get this year?
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My grandma got me a can of peaches one year.....She did give me cash too, but a can of peaches???

 

I told hubby I wanted some pajamas and I figured he would go get some from Victoria Secret a few years ago..he got them from the juniors section of sears with a cartoon character on it and they weren't my size.

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These are soo funny... I love hearing about other people's lives... makes mine seem bearable:)

 

Here is mine:

The year DH and I got engaged future MIL gave me a book on "How to be a good wife and an even better woman":eyepoppin

It had tips on how to "please" your man properly.. cooking, cleaning, and when to "know" your place as a wife.

The book was printed in 1942 and is now in a landfill:yup:

i couldn't stop laughing!

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one year my step-mom bought me a bright pink suede miniskirt - um yeah that never got any use, definately not my style.

 

You can put me down for buying a crappy gift. i just bought on Amazon a Harry Potter robe!!! I am still LMAO about it!!! I am making up a whole dress-up chest for his 3 y.o. daughter and I seen the robe was on sale for $10 on Amazon, and really how could you pass up such a great deal and now he can play with his daughter!!! Really the laughter I'm getting now & going to get when he opens it from this is worth way more than the money spent bwahahahaha!!!!

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