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Lost that loving feeling for Black Friday


lilac100

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So I truly used to love Black Friday.  I had traditions and planned for weeks before hand.  I don't know if it the stores opening on Thanksgiving or maybe my kids getting older but I don't really care anymore.  I can't see leaving my family on Thanksgiving to go and buy stuff.  I remember I would leave the house around midnight and go to Denny's for breakfast with the ads and my sister.  We would decide together what the first store would be.  We would be in line somewhere around 2-3am.  

 

My favorite memory was going by myself one year and standing in line at Toys R Us for some stupid "lab" that my son wanted that I couldn't afford on a normal day.  I actually got him one and I was so broke and so happy to finally be able to get him something he wanted.  If it hadn't been over half off I wouldn't have been able to get it.

 

The last time I think I actually enjoyed it was around 7 years ago when Target had CDs for a ridiculous price so I bought like 15 of them.  

 

It doesn't seem to be about kids stuff or family time anymore.  Its all electronics and opening during family time.  I'm not sure if I will be able to muster up enough caring to even go out this year.  

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I'm sure the Thursday openings hurt that; it does for many people.

 

However, it's also a factor of the technology world we're living in. Everything is about electronics. Even when it is about kids toys, those are also electronics. 

 

Also, so many things are online and make it not even worth going out on Thursday or Friday. Traditions are certainly disrupted and it's a matter of what you need/want and where it will be in store/online.

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It isn't the stores opening on Thursday for me. I come from a long line of blue collar workers, so at least a few of us were always missing for dinner every year. Even before Walmart opened for Thanksgiving, my sister still had to work there because someone has to stock the shelves before Black Friday. My father and I worked at a gas station, and the holidays were our busiest times. Same thing when I worked at a hospital, and my mom at a pharmacy. Nothing new for me. What ruined it for me was all the bad sales. Macy's last year was the final straw. I had several hundred dollars worth of bedding my cart before BF thinking that their prices would go down because of their advertised % off sales and coupons in their BF ad. Wrong! Everything in my cart was more expensive, so I just left it. They have cheaper sales before and after BF. Their coupon codes restrict a lot. It seems like instead of trying to draw people in, they are trying to squeeze every penny out of people that don't know any better. 

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It's not just you for me it's the online options doing it. I still go to Kohls and the mall and I still get stuff there don't get me wrong but the exciting stuff? I order it online especially Kohls. Stores have made it so easy to stay home on Black Friday which is sad. I still go for the excitement and always will I hope
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I'm the same way. My kids are older. They want teen stuff. And unfortunately a lot of it is electronics. I absolutely hate going out on thanksgiving. Last year my hubby and I tried something new because I had hurt my foot 3 days prior and I was in a boot. So he went to help me. We left at the normal time that I used to leave at. And I managed to still get everything I went after except for one item. Which I was able to order online for cheaper a couple of days later. I refuse to let it interfere with my family time again. I only have a few years left with my kids at home I am choosing to cherish it over saving a couple of dollars. [emoji4]
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I really miss standing outside in the cold with my mom for hours just waiting for the hot item of the year. We always met a lot of people and had great conversation. Now with all the early openings it brings everyone out. Sometimes people are not friendly like they used to be. It's sad to think that the Black Friday traditions are changing.
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It hasn't ruined it for me that they are open on TG, my kids are older and my youngest is 16...he has already informed me that he will be with his older brother and his girlfriend's family for TG... Not sure yet if my daughter will be having dinner with me, but a small portion of my fam does a pot-luck TG dinner which is usually fun...I still get my family time, but afterwards I need to burn off all those calories I consumed and walking around Wally World for a couple hours does the trick for me...lol...I agree the sales aren't as big as they used to be, but the excitement is still there for me!!!! 

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I am still excited but I understand where you are coming from. Every year I get pumped up for the ads and then they disappoint, but then I have to remember that I am doing this not just for the thrill but for the smiling faces on CHRISTmas morning. Yes the early openings killed it for me as well but my philosophy was if I miss it I miss it, but I would not miss the family time, I can always get another gift but can never get back the family time that I would lose.  With my kids getting older it is harder to get them something that would surprise them and not brake the bank. When I could get the baby alive dolls or some silly toy it was great and still makes my cry when I think of there utter joy when opening it. That is what keeps me excited those memories, the sacrifices of sitting in the cold wrapped in a blanket knowing if I moved to much I would have to go to the bathroom..... but the thing that brings me the most joy is knowing the true reason for the Season and how that forever changed my life and the world. 

 

So enjoy the season and make the best of what you have and who you have. 

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I enjoy the tradition of doing it, it's more than just what we get or who we get it for. Part of the thrill used to be about getting the Door Busters but to be honest we won't go out on Thursday so we have come to the conclusion that we aren't going to get those anymore. Once we realized that and accepted it then the fun came back. Now we go to the stores we want and some times it's become more about getting the things we want and the thrill of the hunt so to speak, we sometimes have to walk around and dig through things to get what we want. We still go out for our meal part of the way through and when we get home we start wrapping.

 

All in all it's different but we still really look forward to it.

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Black Friday definitely does not have the same feeling to it like it used too. Part of the fun was getting up early, stopping for coffee on the way to the 1st store and standing in line. The thrill of the doors opening and getting the door busters. The last couple years I have found better deals the week before and the week of BF then on BF. I no longer stand in line but go several hours after the stores open after our guests have left. I also did a lot more on line ordering last year and that may happen again this year as we host Thanksgiving dinner and we refuse to change traditions just for a sale. Time spent with our kids and extended family are more to us than being out shopping during Thanksgiving dinner.  I really miss the 4 and 5 am openings!

Edited by berry1014
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I'm just not as "hungry" as I once was.  My income is greater and my kids are older.  I don't "need" the deals like I did back in the day.  I still love the tradition.  I still look forward to black Friday every year and am kind of happy to see that some of the stores local to me are going back to Friday sales just makes it so much better.

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I totally agree with these sentiments. It was better going out super early Friday morning as there was much less traffic and less competition in the stores. Now that the last of my lady relatives has children I will be heading out shopping alone after the Thanksgiving meal to get anything my relatives might want and a few movies for myself. I still enjoy the hunt but it would be better with a teammate, which I would have if it was back to the normal 5am on Friday schedule. It's nice that some retailers are waiting but I wish the big ones would follow suit.
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Listen folks, take it upon yourself to make BF more enjoyable.  I might be getting old and sentimental, but I plan to do just that this year.  In fact, 2016 has been a back to basics adventure for me and I am LOVING it!

 

  1. Dumped Netflix and Prime.  Relying on an antenna for television.  
  2. Turning off the computer after supper.  Getting to bed a little earlier.
  3. Shopping locally -- Kohls, Staples, Walmart, Home Depot, Best Buy
  4. No more warehouse stores -- thank you Aldis for freeing me of bulk purchases

I AM going out to shop on Black Friday and the Farmer's Almanac is predicting snow!  I'm taking my youngest (he doesn't know this) and we are going to stand in line to get one thing to remember.  Then we are going to have breakfast and shop.

 

I am going to shop at least four times between BF and Christmas Eve.  I may not buy anything, but I want to take in the atmosphere, frenzy.

 

I am assembling a collection of Christmas songs and audio books to listen to as I drive around.

 

Merry Christmas!

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I feel the same Len.   Is BF what it was 5-7 years ago? Nope. Will it ever be again? Nope.  So, it's not the same, but that doesn't mean it can't still be FUN!  Our traditions had to change to adapt to the new BF dynamic, but rather than let those traditions go, we did adapt.  I love love love the build up to BF here on Gottadeal. It's part of the tradition for me, and I look forward to it all year long.  Then when the big day/night/day gets here, my sister, daughter in law, and I go out and act silly and laugh and sing and play and generally have a BLAST ushering in the Christmas season.  The crowds are different, the deals are different, the times are definitely different, but the fun is still there if you look for it.

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I've lost the love also.

For me it's a combination of the lack of really great deals + the passage of time. My kids are all grown (19, 19 & 25), no grandkids, parents all gone except MIL, only child so no sibs on my side & in-laws don't do holidays...so it makes a lot less to buy for.

I still spend the same one the kids as I always did, but electronics make the $ not go as far.

Edited by speeddiva
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I've lost the love also.

For me it's a combination of the lack of really great deals + the passage of time. My kids are all grown (19, 19 & 25), no grandkids, parents all gone except MIL, only child so no sibs on my side & in-laws don't do holidays...so it makes a lot less to buy for.

I still spend the same one the kids as I always did, but electronics make the $ not go as far.

Seems to me all the better reason to shop on BF. Help those dollars go further. Get better deals and so forth. :)

 

As I said in my previous post it's not the same anymore, but we have just changed some of our habits and we still go out every year and still end up having fun doing it. One year we even took our daughter and bought stuff for her without her realizing it was FOR her or for the most part know what it was we were buying. As times change we adapt but we make sure we keep our tradition alive and will do so for as long as we can continue to do some.

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I agree, it's just not the same anymore. Black Friday used to be a family girl-bonding thing. It was the only day of the year that my sisters, mom and I could all get away from husbands and kids and just hang out and shop! Now my kids are all teenagers and want boring stuff, the stores are opening earlier and earlier, my mom gets tired quicker these days, and my sisters usually have to work. Oh well, nothing lasts forever I guess. Since I do half of my shopping online now anyway, I am thinking of throwing a laptop party on Wednesday night/ Thursday morning when I know everyone is off work. We can drink wine in our jammies and shop online, all together like we used to.

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I feel ya!  I might just spend this BF shopping online.  Half the evening & morning of last year I was able to buy things on my phone while standing in line at the stores that had already sold out of the item I was looking for anyway!  Hoping I have the same good fortune with online shopping this year!

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I think that Len has a valid point. The only way for people to get the spirit of Black Friday back is to get out there and shop local. I see all too many people getting smarmy about all of the online deals, but where is the adventure in that? This is a once a year event, and if you let the online component take that away from you then you might as well petition for Cyber Monday to be your big event and give up on this Black Friday thing.

 

True fans of Black Friday get out there for the TRADITION. Take a bestie, spouse, an older child or any group of friends and MAKE it a yearly tradition. Don't get me wrong, I love the online component but it has ruined the best of what Black Friday had to offer, which was an old time honored tradition of actually going out, not sitting there in your pajamas and then bragging about a lightning deal that you snagged.

 

With that said, there is an impressive list of stores that intend upon upholding a traditional Black Friday experience and will open on Friday. I suggest that you do your best to support them where and when you can if you truly love this event and what it stands for. 

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I agree with Len here as well.  BF will never be the same, but I've learned to accept it and love it for what it is now.  I don't go out on Thanksgiving day, and I am perfectly fine with that!  I started doing some BF online shopping after Thanksgiving dinner with my husband last year, and I LOVED every second of it.  Something about the two of us sitting next to each other, each one with a laptop, scouring for deals that we can pick up before Friday...it was just so romantical! LMAO. On Friday, I STILL go out, but I do it on my own terms.  I get to the stores between 5:30 and 6 and last year I took my oldest son with me.  He's been listening to me talk about BF for years and was finally old enough to join it.  He loves it too!  So this year, I am looking forward to the "revised" BF tradition.  Me and the hubby will do our online date Thursday for all the "Santa" gifts and then my older son and I will go out Friday morning for the rest of the deals and breakfast.  I'm not a fan of change, but sometimes change can be great!  Can't wait! 

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I'm the same way. I used to LOVE the time from Thanksgiving up till the new year, but the past few years I just haven't been feeling it. My favorite time of the year has always been Black Friday and Christmas day, but my mom died 2 1/2 years ago and was sick a couple years before that and it just hasn't been the same. I still go BF shopping with my sister and we do have a great time every year even if we don't particularly need anything, but nothing feels the same. My husband and sons don't get as excited as I ever did. Can you believe my boys (23 & 17 now) have ALWAYS had to be woken up on Christmas morning! When we were kids, we were awake and ready to get up at 4 in the morning on Christmas day only to be told to go back to bed, but I've always had to wake them up! I still tease them about that! Anyway, there isn't much Christmas spirit in our house so I figure, why bother? I do decorate just to it feels Christmas-y to me. There is word that my husband might get laid off this week from his job that he's worked at for 22 years. I do know what you're saying about BF and I'll get through it, just not as excited as I used to be.

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We lost interest in going out several years ago.  Getting older doesn't work well to stand outside in the cold for hours on end and DH just isn't happy in crowds, especially when we found out that a lot of the stuff we wanted was still available later in the day.  We used to go to Staples and get a bunch of stuff, but being able to do it online is just easier for us.  A couple years ago I had hip surgery in November and was forced to do it all online and discovered I had a lot less stress, so did it last year and will do it again this year.  No one will be disappointed if they don't get a certain item, so that helps.  We have a new son in law this year so had to add him to our lists, but he is even harder to buy for that my DH, so his main gift will be a Visa gift card bought from AAA when they have their "no fee" promotion.  When grandkids come along it may change, but then again maybe not.

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I feel the same - it is just not as 'thrilling' for us anymore as it used to be. I think for us, it is a mix of stores being open on Thanksgiving (I absolutely will not give up Thanksgiving with my family), the kids getting older, AND stores making it so easy to shop online for the same deals you can get in the stores and free shipping (and sometimes it's even better because they don't have as limited quantities as the stores do). That being said, we do still go out every single Black Friday. It feels like we're breaking tradition if we don't, and it has always gotten me into the holiday mood to be out with the crowds of people and hearing the music, buying that first peppermint mocha from Starbucks, maybe even more so now that I'm not fighting for position or for the last hot toy. Plus, the one store I don't shop online for is Bath & Body Works because I do love that they let you stack as many coupons as you want...so we always make it a point to go there on BF. 

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Perhaps we will get a better understanding in the next week or so when the rest of the store openings will be released. I do recall from years past that many people were calling Black Friday shoppers greedy and they were arguing that they did not feel that it was fair that all of the stores opened at the same time! Having so many open up on Friday is a good thing, but it would be better if major retailers had to alternate between Thursday and Friday to break it up and give all shoppers a needed break and a fairer chance at all of the goodies.

 

I knew in years past that the trip to Walmart was a scavenger hunt, after spending my time camped in front of Best Buy. When they staggered the sales by creating events 1-3, it gave me a chance of enjoying two shopping experiences! If all stores could come together on this and alternate the shopping days, they would put the shopper first and give the employees a break every other year.

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Anyone who has been Black Friday shopping for a very long time would all agree we would like to go back to the way it was. But every year when I think that I won't really care I get that itchy, anxiety feeling and HAVE get up at 1 am on Thanksgiving Day to go online. I agree with other people who have posted you still need to get out there- I now go to Petsmart on Friday morning. It's fulfills desire ( used loosely!) to stand in line, fill my cart with great deals and chat with other BFers that are out and wear my Gotta Deal shirts. On the way home I swing by other stores along the way and see what's left or on sale. It makes me happy and I have come to enjoy the new Black Friday!
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This might actually be my favorite part of BF.  I check in Labor Day and wait for the conversation to pick up.  I love the product specific dialog, the gift ideas, and fun games (like writing haiku poems).  I enjoy poring over the ads, making my lists, and plotting a plan.  It's foreplay to the shopping.  Lots of fun.  The sales are exciting.  When the buying is done, I bask in the warm afterglow of casual shopping among those who are still losing their minds, the Christmas decorations and music, and, near the end, some unexpected bargains.

 

The problem with BF becoming an online event is that you end up doing the exciting part by yourself and that, while satisfying, is just not as good as doing it with others.

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This might actually be my favorite part of BF.  I check in Labor Day and wait for the conversation to pick up.  I love the product specific dialog, the gift ideas, and fun games (like writing haiku poems).  I enjoy poring over the ads, making my lists, and plotting a plan.  It's foreplay to the shopping.  Lots of fun.  The sales are exciting.  When the buying is done, I bask in the warm afterglow of casual shopping among those who are still losing their minds, the Christmas decorations and music, and, near the end, some unexpected bargains.

 

The problem with BF becoming an online event is that you end up doing the exciting part by yourself and that, while satisfying, is just not as good as doing it with others.

I actually think one of the things I've loved the past few years is trying to get some of the great deals on Christmas Decorations, we have bought almost all new LED lights, we have picked up a couple of the really expensive air blown decorations for the yard (got one that was normally $160 last year for $60). It's been fun stalking and hunting down the deals at those stores. Got a lot of good stuff from Home Depot, I use order online and pick up in store for the things it will let me do that and we visit the stores for things it won't. Has made replacing a lot of our older stuff much more reasonably priced.

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